Where Does Uncle Drew Rank Among The Greatest Fictional Ballers?

We first began hearing about the legend of Uncle Drew six years ago. 

Uncle Drew | Chapter 1 | Pepsi Max

Pepsi MAX went to a pick-up game in Bloomfield, NJ pretending to shoot a documentary on a basketball player named “Kevin.” When his Uncle Drew came into the game, some magical things happened. http://www.PepsiMAX.com/facebook Subscribe: http://www.youtube.com/subscription_center?add_user=pepsi Connect with Pepsi: http://www.pepsi.com http://www.twitter.com/pepsi http://www.facebook.com/pepsi http://www.instagram.com/pepsi

And now, thanks to Charles Stone III‘s feature film, we get to learn more about the mysterious Rucker Park legend, who reportedly once threw down a monstrous, thunderous left-handed dunk while simultaneously eating and holding a ham sandwich, with extra mayonnaise, in his right!!! 


I’ve heard of dudes snatching quarters off the top of the backboard, jumping over cars and all types of feats that defy the laws of polarity and gravitivity, but I ain’t nevah-evah-evah heard of anyone doing anything like that. 

Unless you saw the playground GOAT’s in their prime, the guys who were just as good as the Kobe’s and Jordan’s but never got their chance to shine in the NBA for the world to see like Earl Manigault, Pee Wee Kirkland, Joe Hammond and others, you can only rely on the everlasting lore of the blacktop.

But that’s not true in Uncle Drew’s case. Because even at the age of 75 or so, he still manages to miraculously play like a reasonable facsimile of the incomparable Kyrie Irving.

So after going with my family to see the film this weekend, and laughing as Drew puts his old squad together for one final run at The Rucker – enlisting the services of Big Fella, Preacher, Lights, Boots and Betty Lou – my basketball brain would not allow me to sit still. 

I’ve spent the better part of 24 hours wondering, “Is Uncle Drew the best cinematic baller ever?”

Here’s a quick breakdown:


3. Sidney Deane and Billy Hoyle, White Men Cant Jump

They were a dynamic duo that hustled mad loot against some pretty serious ballers on the Los Angeles playgrounds.  They’d hang in there for a while in a serious game of two-on-two against anyone, except for the next two squads on this list. 

White Men Can’t Jump (2/5) Movie CLIP – Hustling Raymond (1992) HD

White Men Can’t Jump movie clips: http://j.mp/1ixl2Ds BUY THE MOVIE: FandangoNOW – https://www.fandangonow.com/details/movie/white-men-cant-jump-1992/1MVc9431212dc7a7baa31f30d1a4a02abd3?cmp=Movieclips_YT_Description iTunes – http://apple.co/1QuOa8x Google Play – http://bit.ly/1ImPeME Amazon – http://amzn.to/1QaF3yW Fox Movies – http://bit.ly/1KHIHth Don’t miss the HOTTEST NEW TRAILERS: http://bit.ly/1u2y6pr CLIP DESCRIPTION: Sidney (Wesley Snipes) and Billy (Woody Harrelson) get a knife pulled on them when they try to hustle some street ball players.

Billy would be cool, splashing jumpers and hitting Sidney with some precise dimes off the pick-and-roll, but once Jake Shuttlesworth started yelling, “Shoe Program! King Kong ain’t got shit on me! You’ll be playing basketball in Pelican Bay! Awwww, you mother******s. Okay. Alright. I’m putting cases on all of you b*****s!”, before telling Billy what he’d done to his moms at the Coney Island short-stay, Deane and Hoyle would fold up like Walmart lawn furniture.


2. Jesus and Jake Shuttlesworth, He Got Game

We all know how nice Jesus Shuttlesworth was, but how come nobody ever talks about old man Jakes skills? This father-son combo would school the aforementioned Sidney and Billy. Once they started speaking Hungarian, fuhgetaboutit!. 

He Got Game-Denzel Washington VS Ray Allen Scene:Hungarian

He got game(a jtk rdge) 1998 Denzel vs ray allen ending scene magyar

They’d be calling out plays and whatnot, and no one would know what they’re talking about.

1. Butch McRae and Neon Boudeaux, Blue Chips

No character in the history of film has a chance against Neon. The dude is 7-feet tall and dunks everything in sight, his shooting percentage has to be 90%. And his damn name is Neon!!! And Butch just might the best and most athletic cinematic point guard ever. 

Blue Chips (9/9) Movie CLIP – Neon Jams, Winning! (1994) HD

Blue Chips movie clips: http://j.mp/15w4sOq BUY THE MOVIE: http://j.mp/JecU2p Don’t miss the HOTTEST NEW TRAILERS: http://bit.ly/1u2y6pr CLIP DESCRIPTION: In the final seconds, Neon (Shaquille O’Neal) scores the winning basket for Western and Coach Pete Bell (Nick Nolte). FILM DESCRIPTION: Blue Chips examines greed, cheating, and “winning at all costs” in the world of college basketball.

This two-man wrecking crew would be unbeatable, especially since Neon would be spared from having to depend on his most glaring weakness because everybody knows that you don’t shoot no damn free throws in a game of 2-on-2.

Top Ten Individuals

10. Scott Howard, Teen Wolf

My man turns into a damn wolf. A DAMN WOLF!!! And his hops are ridiculous.

Teen Wolf (1985) – The Wolf Can Dunk Scene (6/10) | Movieclips

Teen Wolf movie clips: http://j.mp/1Ep10EO BUY THE MOVIE: https://www.fandangonow.com/details/movie/teen-wolf-1985/MMV29C79B14BB571B458E923E5C65F213CCE?cmp=Movieclips_YT_Description Don’t miss the HOTTEST NEW TRAILERS: http://bit.ly/1u2y6pr CLIP DESCRIPTION: In a scrap for the ball, Scott (Michael J. Fox) turns wolf and pulls off an impressive slam dunk.

Nuff’ said. 

But most dudes on this list wouldn’t be scared in the least. They’d be cracking jokes on him all game, talking about, “Your mom’s underarms look like she got Don King in a headlock!!!”

9. Jamal Wallace, Finding Forrester

Jamal had game, but he wasn’t clutch. Bricking the game winning free throws at Madison Square Garden holds him back from climbing any higher on this list. 

Finding Forrester (4/8) Movie CLIP – The Pulitzer Prize (2000) HD

Finding Forrester movie clips: http://j.mp/1uwhd6R BUY THE MOVIE: http://amzn.to/uCBRma Don’t miss the HOTTEST NEW TRAILERS: http://bit.ly/1u2y6pr CLIP DESCRIPTION: Jamal (Rob Brown) asks William (Sean Connery) if he ever entered any writing competition. William responds “once,” and that he won the Pulitzer.

But he’s a helluva writer, and I dig great writers. So he makes the top ten

8. Will Smith, Fresh Prince of Bel Air

Will woulda been higher on this list if he wasn’t such a ball hog, and wasn’t playing against bums on 8-foot rims.

the fresh prince of bel air will smith and carlton banks

Will Smith and Carlton Banks play basketball for Bel-Air Academy in The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. If you like the Will Smith or Carlton Banks basketball jerseys. Get your jersey now:http://bit.ly/2zQoOB6

7. Monica Wright, Love and Basketball

Quincy doesn’t make the list because he got no left hand whatsoever! And that glaring weakness was easily exposed in the NBA and most likely got the general manager that drafted him fired. But Monica is the real deal, though.

Love & Basketball

Quincy & Monica play 1 on 1 “No copyright infringement intended.All materials used property of their respective owners.”

Yes lawd! 

She’s fiery, struggling with her emotions on the court because all she wants to do is win. When her high school squad loses the state championship game, she’s a mess. The devastation is evident as she damn near drowns in her tears. She ain’t hugging up on people she probably plays AAU with. And at USC, she struggles for playing time and beefs with her coach before eventually winning the starting point guard spot. 

Before the advent of the WNBA, her only shot at pro ball is in Barcelona, where she leads her squad to a championship. Eventually , once the WNBA comes into existence, she comes back home to remind everyone that she’s the real deal. 

My only beef is that she wound up marrying Quincy. Not because when she came to be by his side after he tore his ACL, she learned that he was engaged to Karen. But because everyone knows that if you’re a stone-cold baller, you ain’t falling in love with nobody that ain’t got no left hand!!!

6. Jimmy Chitwood, Hoosiers

Am I the only one who thinks this cat should be more of a trash talker, chanting, “Jimmy want mo’, Jimmy want mo’, Jimmy want, Jimmy want, Jimmy want mo’!!!” every time he pulls up from deep?

Hoosiers (12/12) Movie CLIP – Jimmy’s Final Shot (1986) HD

Hoosiers movie clips: http://j.mp/1Lk0Q2j BUY THE MOVIE: http://j.mp/1bFA1Uo Don’t miss the HOTTEST NEW TRAILERS: http://bit.ly/1u2y6pr CLIP DESCRIPTION: With the game on the line, Coach Dale (Gene Hackman) puts his trust in Jimmy (Maris Valainis), who sinks the final shot. FILM DESCRIPTION: Hoosiers tells the true story of a group of underdogs who become champions.

5. Warren Coolidge, The White Shadow

Remember when Coolidge moved in with Reeves after becoming homeless due to his apartment building burning down? Or when Thorpe slept with Coolidge’s girl and gave her a sexually transmitted disease? How about when Jackson reconciled with an old girlfriend only to learn that she’d become a prostitute? Do you recall when Gomez got beat up by his violent father, or when Salami was doing the horizontal Humpty Dance with his teacher? Or when Curtis Jackson got murdered?

The White Shadow

The White Shadow

Damn, if you’re a millennial, you have no idea what I’m talking about. Well, Coolidge was the man, you’ll just have to take my word for it. The big man was a rebounding machine and a force in the low post.

4. Shep, Above The Rim

Yo! Shep scored 38 points at Rucker Park in two minutes, while wearing corduroys and thermal underwears!!! 

Above The Rim: The Game

Great Scene: Birdie finally gets to see his big brother Shep play.

Who else can say they ever did that?

3. Nathaniel “Cornbread” Hamilton, Cornbread, Earl and Me

Damn! Damn!! Damn!!!

Cornbread, Earl And Me (1975) – HD Trailer [1080p]

Review: http://cinapse.co/2016/06/24/cornbread-earl-and-me Get it at Amazon! Blu-ray – http://amzn.to/28OCG5P DVD – http://amzn.to/28T9Hwz VHS – http://amzn.to/28PetIK Copyright owner? I support film – including yours! All Blazing Trailers videos include links to purchase the films where applicable. Film trailers are inherently advertisements, and as such I present them here under fair use to our mutual benefit.

Wanna see a grown man cry? A grown man basketball junkie whose aunt took him to see Cornbread, Earl and Me at the Duffield Theater in Brooklyn in the summer of 1975? All you gotta do is scream, “YOU KILLED CORNBREAD!!!” And my eyes will automatically get watery.

Cornbread was the best high school player in the country before the police shot and killed him in a case of mistaken identity. Who knows what he could have gone on to become. Perhaps a college All-American at UCLA who would later catch dimes on the Showtime fast break from Magic Johnson. We’ll never know. But given how good he was at such a young age, he is easily among the best fictional ballers ever. R.I.P. Cornbread.

2. Moses Guthrie, The Fish That Saved Pittsburgh

Moses is a Pisces. Pisces are very friendly and selfless, they are always willing to help others, without hoping to get anything back. Their ruling planet is Neptune, so Pisces are more intuitive than others and have an artistic talent. They are wise, generous, compassionate and extremely faithful and caring.

The Fish That Saved Pittsburgh – Moses Guthrie/Dr. J Playground Scene

Moses schools Toby after she cries to him about Tyrone. One of the best scenes in all moviedom. No one does it better.

I dont care what his opponent’s astrological sign is, Moses will bust his ass wearing polyester slacks and dress shoes!

1. Uncle Drew, Uncle Drew

Uncle Drew is about 75 years old. Clarence the Barber will tell you, “Uncle Drew always lied about his age! He lied about his age all the time! One time, Frank Sinatra came in here, and sat in this chair. I say, “Frank, you hang out with Uncle Drew. Just between me and you, how old is Uncle Drew?” Know what Frank told me? He said “Hey, Uncle Drew is a hunnnitt-thirty-seven years old. A hunnitt-thirty-seven years old!”

Uncle Drew (2018 Movie) Official Trailer – Kyrie Irving, Shaq, Lil Rel, Tiffany Haddish

Uncle Drew – In Theaters June 29, 2018! Starring Kyrie Irving, Lil Rel Howery, Shaquille O’Neal, Reggie Miller, Nate Robinson, Chris Webber, Erica Ash, Lisa Leslie, with Tiffany Haddish and Nick Kroll.

Regardless of what his birth certificate says, if he’s still cracking ankles and getting buckets in his geriatric stage, he takes the overall No. 1 spot from Moses Guthrie. 

Uncle Drew has a great feel, love and appreciation for the game, with an imagination and killer instinct that only the best of the best ever possessed. He can easily drop 50 every time he steps on the court, but he’s also a facilitator that can elevate the play of those around him. 

His burst, vision and passing remain exceptional, all these years after dunking on a dude while eating a ham sandwich, with extra mayonnaise, at the same damn time!!!

UNCLE DREW Clip – Dance Club (2018) Kyrie Irving Basketball Comedy HD

UNCLE DREW Clip – Dance Club (2018) Kyrie Irving Basketball Comedy HD SUBSCRIBE for more Movie Clips HERE: https://goo.gl/8xzRw4 After draining his life savings to enter a team in the Rucker Classic street ball tournament in Harlem, Dax (Lil Rel Howery) is dealt a series of unfortunate setbacks, including losing his team to his longtime rival (Nick Kroll).

He loves the razzle-dazzle, but he’s also a purist who believes in making the right play. He can still soar to the rim for illmatic dunks, and he’s an outstanding shooter with great form on his jumper. 

And his ambidextrous finishing skills at the rim, off the dribble, against the giants in the paint, was definitely borrowed by Rod Strickland, who certainly saw Uncle Drew tearing up the parks in the Bronx and Harlem when he was a little kid. 

And if Uncle Drew is still giving out that work while wearing senior citizen diapers, can you imagine what he looked like in his prime, some 50 or so years ago? 

Hands down, Uncle Drew is the best to ever do it.

(P.S. Michael Jordan would have battled for the top spot, but he played himself in Space Jam, which doesn’t make him fictional)

Back to top